Mandals are making a come back?!

Just when I thought that we had surpassed the era of those hideous mandals…. I spotted a woman at lunch wearing them. It was shameful. Of course I secretly took a picture and sent it to my fellow mandal-hater (Hi Goose!!) and she too was horrified by the sighting. I swear to you – a part of me dies each time I see them. Sigh. I thought it was just a one time thing until I went to Sam’s a week later. And there she was – a middle-aged mandal-wearing offender. Okay, okay, okay…. no need to freak out, right?! I’m just in Sam’s – it’s probably that last time I will see something this horrific. Then last Friday, we went to see Wicked (AMAZING SHOW!!!) but before the show we grabbed a bite to eat at The Spaghetti Warehouse downtown. At the table sitting directly next to us – this lady was wearing that offensive footwear. I about died. Clearly, there is a very serious mandal problem in the city of Dayton.

I don’t care who you are, what you do for a living, how educated you are or how much money you make – there is no excuse for you to wear mandals. None. Why would any woman willingly put those shoes – if you even would call them that – on their feet? The only reasonable explanation is that crappy shoe salesmen are drugging innocent woman, robbing them of their reason and forcing them to wear monstrosities on their feet. That’s the only way any of this makes sense. You can’t trust these women – they have been compromised and there is no telling how off their judgement is if they are wearing mandals. I genuinely fear for the general population in America. If we continue to condone this kind of destructive behavior we are going to have a very serious social problem.

To all you mandal-wearing-woman who happened to read this: I am sorry if I have offended you but your choice in footwear has offended me. You are giving our gender a bad name (in shoes) and that’s not okay. Someone has to speak out for the majority. This is not okay so…

STOP WEARING MANDALS!!